Discussion about this post

User's avatar
Anton's avatar

Thank you for sharing this, Ryan. The way you described loneliness as a mirage really struck me. It’s fascinating how we can spend so much time resisting an emotion, thinking it’s the worst thing ever, only to find that it’s not nearly as terrifying as we made it out to be. I can relate to how loneliness once felt like something I had to avoid at all costs, but the way you surrendered to it and saw it for what it was—just another passing emotion—makes me think I should approach my own discomforts with more curiosity and less resistance. Your story is a great reminder that the only way out is through. Thank you again for your honesty and for offering such a powerful perspective.

Expand full comment
Teri Leigh 💜's avatar

I love this Ryan. The experience of facing loneliness and it being a mirage! My experience with loneliness was quite different. I went deep into the feels of it after my divorce. It was scary. And one of the most painful times of my life. What I learned about myself in reading your post is that I didn’t really ever surrender to loneliness in that time. Sure, I found ways to embrace solitude (and that was beautiful) but as much as I thought I was sitting with loneliness, I was still fighting it. And some of the behaviors I had then, in fighting and fleeing loneliness, only brought on shame. And shame and loneliness are not a good combination!

I healed a lot in that time. And there’s still more to heal. I still have fears around loneliness. Sigh. Such is life. Everything is a process. I trust the process.

What I can say is that meeting you has been one of the greatest blessings of being on substack. I no longer feel loneliness in my business as an entrepreneur. That’s been a 25 year journey of walking (unwillingly) with loneliness. I thank you.

Expand full comment
33 more comments...

No posts