25 Comments

thx 🌹🌻🌸💐💚💛💜❤️🌼😍🥰

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Thank you, Mr. Ma.

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You strike me as inherently possessing two qualities that make for a powerful combo: sensitivity AND resilience. Thanks for letting us see more of you, Ryan, we all like what we see!

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Ha! Thank you for your encouraging words and reflection, Kelly. They help me better understand myself. You're right that I possess those traits, but I had never considered their power together. :o) I'll keep revealing myself! Thanks again.

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That’s a helluva path Ryan. Experience is a great, if sometimes cruel, teacher. The three highlights:

1) you got a colonoscopy without anesthesia?!? You were a serious young buck!

2) markets can indeed stay irrational longer then we can stay solvent. (Housel & Taleb are great thinkers on risk).

3) Move! Although Willie Nelson said the zen-est thing ever - “still is still moving to me”.

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I'm grateful you were willing to read such a lengthy essay, Brett.

1) Without anesthesia, I felt very bloated.

2) Appreciate the suggestion - both are wise men. I learned the hard way.

3) That's funny 'ol Willie. 😀

Thank you, my friend.

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Hi Ryan-

I continue to read your post each week and marvel at your insight as well as your excelling communication through your incredible writing skills. Clearly you have the Anderson artistic gene! I so appreciate your honesty as well as your vulnerability. I struggle with getting a consistent meditation practice, and you consistently remind me of the value. Thank you for sharing your journey and willingness to help others. Look forward to seeing you soon! 🙏 🥰

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Hey, Deanne, I appreciate your kind and encouraging words. It means a lot to me that you took the time to share this. Developing a consistent meditation practice took me a long time, but it's been infinitely worthwhile. If you would like support, I'm happy to help. Thank you again, and see you soon!

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While your path has had lots of twists and turns, as we all do, it's inspiring how often you find your way back to healthy decisions including meditation. It's a great reminder that we can steer ourselves back onto course whenever we realize we've lost our way a bit.

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I appreciate you reflecting this back to me, Nancy. I got more lost in family than anything since starting on this path. It's been humbling, and I must re-learn much, making the teachings fresher and as relevant as ever. Thanks again.

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Classic essay. Thoroughly enjoyed. Shared experiences throughout. INFJs unite!

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I appreciate your words, and I'm glad you enjoyed it and could relate to it, Mike. Yes, INFJs unite! Considering how few of us there are, there sure seem to be a lot of us! :)

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Hey Ryan! Wow, what a read. Thank you for sharing all your experiences and your journey here. At 34, I’m continuing to practice a lot of these things too, particularly setting boundaries, meditation + journaling, eating healthy (my BS in Kinesiology helps!), and being mindful.

I, too, had a nervous system on overdrive growing up, which became even more evident during a previous 12-year relationship with my ex in my 20’s. We ended things when I was 30, which is also around the time when I started paying more attention to my “inner self” and wanting a different way of living. I’m now in a much healthier relationship and love myself more, but I know there’s still so much work to do. Life IS hard, but it is also rich and rewarding. Cheering you on from afar on your journey and wishing you the best! Thank you again for the inspiring read.

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Same here, Dana. I wouldn't be surprised at all if Ryan attracts highly-sensitive readers who have resiliently learned how to go from and through that!

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Thank you, Kelly. ☺️ That would be lovely.

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I'm grateful for your encouragement and excited that we share a similar path. Like me, it sounds like you reached 30 and realized you didn't want to continue living that way. So, you turned inward and began actively caring for yourself through many practices, which is beautiful and heartening.

I'm happy for you that you're in a healthier relationship and that you understand there's still much work to do. Healing and waking up are lifestyles and never-ending paths. And you're right. Life is challenging, rich and rewarding!

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I'm really moved by your journey to finding what truly worked for you. What’s sticking with me, though, is your experience with self-improvement. It’s interesting how self-improvement, something we’re always told to chase, doesn’t bring the happiness we expect. It makes me wonder if all the focus on productivity, goal-setting, and competition (especially at work) is really just about fitting into the systems around us and not about true fulfillment. As someone in my early twenties, I’m reflecting on how much of what we’re taught, like constantly improving and growing, really helps us feel content inside. If self-improvement isn’t the answer, why do we talk about it so much?

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I'm excited you're asking such questions at a young age because you may save yourself time, disappointment and disillusionment. That said, there's value in doing what doesn't work.

Self-improvement has value. Developing habits is the best aspect of self-improvement because it touches all of life, including spirituality, where fulfillment can be found.

Self-improvement is popular because it has a low barrier to entry. Anyone can start drinking eight glasses of water, eating better or getting exercise. Healing and waking up is more challenging. Everything about self-improvement affirms American culture: "You can have whatever you want if you work hard enough." Our ability to influence outer circumstances is limited despite what popular culture would have us believe.

Building habits will help one feel more empowered. But there can be no lasting satisfaction if used only to be more productive, make more money or buy more stuff. Fulfillment, meaning and satisfying the heart's longing require going inside, not perfecting one's butt, achieving a personal best or reading 100 books a year.

What do you think?

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As a fellow INTJ who read Dale Carnegie in high school, I appreciate your journey. In my 50's, I discovered mindfulness and energy psychology. That has helped me significantly in leraning siilat lessons... and moving beyound the frustrations of traditional self improvement. Thanks fo sharing and encouraging!

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It's fun to hear you're an INTJ and read Dale Carnegie in high school, too. It seems we must go through the self-improvement phase to realize it doesn't quite satisfy our heart's longing for more.

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Wow!! 🤩 What a read and what insights! Thank you Ryan!!!! This is such a gift you’ve given us. 🙏 👍 💪

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I appreciate you taking the time to read it and comment, Mike. Thank you, brother. 🤗

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😃 I love listening to someone's notes on their life story, wonderful share Ryan. I also experienced minimalism for the first time at 31, and believe it's had the greatest impact for me as well.

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Minimalism is really supportive of wellbeing, isn't it? Considering how many challenges it addresses, it's one of the most overhyped yet underrated and underutilized practices.

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Thank you for sharing this! It is really helpful to read about your experiences as I find myself in quite some of your old habits. And it is helpful to read what you've learned from that :)

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