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Ernst Nathorst-Böös's avatar

A number of years ago I realized I had a thing where I thought I couldn't give praise to someone if I also had a criticism. I thought I was somehow betraying myself or the relation if I was saying something positive while holding back the negative. That I was somehow insincere. That led me to be very shy with my praise, since there's almost always something that we would like to be different. I have worked really hard on breaking that mindset, and I'm now much more generous with positive feedback and can't really imagine how things were. Thanks for reminding me of this Ryan, lovely article!

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Justin Mulvaney's avatar

I wish for this message to echo around the globe. Reminds me of a convo I had with a friend in college:

"One of the biggest tragedies of being human is the nicest things that are said about someone are so rarely said to their face. We say them to each other, away from them, but don't bring it to them."

Since them have tried to make a habit of noticing when I'm saying something nice about someone but not to them, and delivering the message.

Thanks for writing and reminding me of this.

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